I’ve always dreamed of celebrating my birthday with my closest friends and be surprised by people I care about. Turned out, this year is still not going to go smooth sailing and cherry-picking. But, that’s fine! I believe the next years will become more meaningful and special as far as the experiences go.
This year, I simply celebrated my birthday with my fellow-celebrant, who happens to be my boyfriend in a eat-all you can buffet located near my workplace. It’s our first time to be actually be surrounded by that much food, it’s a great experience even though I wasn’t able to eat a lot due to, yes, you guessed it, anxiety. But I was happy 🙂
This year, I am feeling the pressure of being an adult. I thank God every day that I am still employed and healthy. I must admit that I still feel a little nervous about everything that is happening around me. A little overwhelmed and anxious of what’s going to happen next. But, there’s no doubt that I have a lot to be thankful about. I am still a long way run to being emotionally open and totally okay. However, I am going to fight for this. There are nights I still lose the battle and wake up with the same dread, but I will continue and try to live.
I miss spending time with my friends and just chilling and be involved in each other’s lives, but maybe I’m still on the transition. This maybe a better birthday, but I am claiming this is not the best one yet! I want to celebrate next year, or maybe in the next 5 years to come, to finally be connected again. One day, it will happen. But for now, I am more than grateful with what I already have.